Blooming Outside the Lines
Blooming Outside the Lines is a podcast for women who have spent their lives trying to be good enough and instead feel tired, overwhelmed, anxious, depressed, and often guilty about their body size or their eating. If that’s you, you’re not alone and you deserve to be you—even if others disagree.
I’m a licensed psychologist who’s worked with women for over 30 years. I understand how hard it is to relax or take time for self-care, and the deep pull we feel for approval—approval that often defines us.
We’ll talk about how the brain and our capabilities change when we ignore our self-care, wait until we have time for it, can’t say no, or fear disapproval.
I’ll provide support, encouragement, and practical strategies for building your confidence from the inside out, for stepping into your own truth and blooming into the most radiant version of yourself.
The information shared in this podcast is for educational purposes only. It is not meant to replace the advice of any of your healthcare providers and does not mean we have a client/therapist relationship.
Episodes
19 episodes
never enough—is this fear really yours?
What if you realized your fear of being good enough was actually someone else’s fear? Would it help you to let it go? In this episode, I discuss inherited fears, how old fears remain alive and well when isolated in the brain, and how, instead o...
what does "good enough" really mean?
Do you find yourself struggling with a fear of not being good enough? If so, you are certainly not alone. In this episode, I explorewhether we have an end-goal when we talk about being good enough.wh...
can you make someone feel happy, sad, . . .?
In my last episode I introduced appeasing and disconnecting and our tendency to swing back and forth between the two. In this episode, I begin looking at how we can change that pattern by examining the belief that we are responsible for how oth...
when is it my turn? or, how do I hold on to my needs in relationships?
Do you say “yes” to coffee even when you don’t have the time, or do you worry about saying “no” for fear the person will no longer approve of you? In this episode I tackle the struggle that so many of us face: how to hold on to what we need whi...
finding the gift in anxiety
In my episode, “Stress: the surprising link to higher performance and a more meaningful life,” I shared research supporting a shift in how we perceive anxiety. In this episode I talk about how to make that shift. I share,ho...
how the nervous system is like a baby
Would you leave a baby with a wet diaper, miserable and crying, until you have time off? Probably not. Explore how your nervous system is like a baby, and putting off self-care is the equivalent of doing just that, leaving a baby unattended or ...
stress: the surprising link to higher performance and a more meaningful life
Most of us believe that stress is bad for us and anxiety something to be feared or avoided. In my last episode I explored misconceptions about anxiety that leave us fearing it. In this episode, I sharea look at research supporting h...
is fear of anxiety robbing us of our confidence?
It’s hard to miss the message that stress is bad for us. We are bombarded with messages about how to deal with stress and to be less anxious. Because of this, it is hard to imagine that anxiety serves a purpose. In this episode, I share
women, epigenetics, and the need to please
What if the fears you face today are echoes of those who came before you? In this episode, I explore epigenetics and its potential implications for our struggle to believe we have done enough. In it I share,how one generation's fear...
want to be yourself in the world? your feelings provide the roadmap.
Do painful feelings seem like something you would rather avoid? Or maybe when you feel them, they end up swamping you, and you get stuck in them. In this episode, I explorewhy as women we often struggle identifying our feelings.
will I ever be enough?
Do you wonder if what you do will ever be enough—if you will be enough? If so, you’re not alone. I encountered that belief so often while working with women in therapy that I wrote a book about it. And although it happens less often than it use...
identifying with our feelings robs us of their gift
Life can sure be stressful. It’s easy to get overwhelmed and feel trapped by our emotions. In this episode, I share ways to benefit from feelings and strategies to avoid getting overwhelmed by them. I explore the disadvantages ...
true or false: better body image comes from a better body?
Do you avoid mirrors and cringe when you see yourself in one? In this episode I share what body image is, and isn’t, and how this knowledge can help you heal your relationship with the mirror. In it, I sharehow images are formed in ...
derailed by disapproval? daffodils and tulips are both beautiful, and one cannot be the other.
Do you believe what you do is never enough—that you are not enough? If so, you are not alone. In this episode I explore the possible origins of the pressure women feel to gain approval and how my work with women led to the expression, “Blooming...
Worried you're not calm enough? Maybe you are right where you're meant to be.
Are we designed to be calm? We certainly get that impression from the messages we receive. Anxiety is uncomfortable. I get it because I’ve been there. The problem is that expecting to be calm may be unrealistic and result in more symptoms. Join...
Is self-care selfish?
Learn why believing self-care is selfish backfires. If you are questioning whether you “should” be taking time out for self-care when our nation is in crisis, this episode will tackle that question by delving into the physiological repercussion...
Why self-acceptance?
If you believe that being hard on yourself will foster change, this episode just might shake up that belief. In it, Deb tackles self-acceptance—exploring why it is so important and the resistance it typically stirs up. Some key points she share...
Roadblocks to finding our purpose
Wish you knew your purpose in life and wonder what is wrong with you that you don’t? What if it wasn’t personal and had more to do with our socialization as women? Would that allow you to ease up on yourself? In this episode Deb uses her life, ...
